Episode 3

Laying the Foundation: Your Attention Informs Your Reality | EP 003

Dr. Judith describes how attention works to create our reality which is a foundational stone in soul development, the distinction between attention and intention, and the power of the subconscious mind, which affects the Law of Attraction. She also discusses the importance of reassessing what you are constantly putting your attention on and a willingness to shift these focuses if having a negative pull on your energy, soul, and well-being.

Please feel free to join our Mastering Life's Adventures (MLA) Extras and Community Forum for seekers desiring a community of like-minded people!


About the Host:

Dr. Judith Holder’s passion is empowering people to be their best selves! Dr. Holder is the founder and executive director of Unique Pathways™ (www.uniquepathwayscoaching.com). She is a leadership coach-psychologist, facilitator, consultant, and author.

Our paths are filled with many adventures in which Judith believes can be seen as growth opportunities, even during challenging times. She likes to think about, discover, and discuss personal and professional life’s circumstances as you journey through life, through the lens of Christian values, Buddhist precepts, Ascended Master teachings and Esoteric Principles to gain greater clarity and mastery in daily living. 

Dr. Holder is the author of Mastering Life’s Adventures: On the Beam – Essential Insights for Growth and Self-Mastery, and an e-book, Opening Up to Your Divinity: Practical Strategies and Practices for Soul Growth

On a personal note, Dr. Holder sees herself as a perpetual student learning from her everyday adventures, which she considers as a part her ongoing growth and evolution of her SOUL. The fun part is we are all walking similar journeys together!

Judith enjoys spending time with family, vacationing at beaches and mountains sides, reading, walking, partaking in mindfulness practices, and is a certified yoga instructor.


Dr. Holder’s books on Mastering Life’s Adventures: On the Beam and Opening Up to Your Divinity: Practical Strategies and Practices for Soul Growth can be found at -



Mastering Life’s Adventures “How to” Downloadable Courses at www.uniquepathwayscoaching.com under the Tab “Offerings”

  • Course 1: Mastering Life’s Adventures mini-course
  • Course 2: Opening Up to Your Divinity mini-course


Learn more about “Mental Fitness for Busy People”, at www.uniquepathwayscoaching.com under the Tab, “Offerings”


You can also check out Dr. Holder’s at

LinkedIn page: https://www.linkedin.com/in/judith-c-holder-phd-ms-pcc-bcc-a1a4a57/

Executive and Leadership Coaching website: www.uniquepathwayscoaching.com

Speaking Engagements (for Women New to Leading): www.drjudithholder.com


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Dr. Judith Holder:

Welcome to Mastering Life's Adventures, an educational podcast about tapping into your true self, the soul, your soul, the substance of your life, to discover what life's ups and downs are really about, and how to have a greater sense of purpose, peace, joy, and fulfillment. I am Dr. Judith Holder and your host, Coach psychologist Delos seeker, he enjoys diving into the connections between spirituality, psychology, wellness, and your everyday life adventures. All preparing and polishing you like the fast is a magnificent diamond to be your best self. If you're craving more from your life, you are in the right place. Come let's journey together and transforming what you know. And to who you really are mastering mice adventures begins now.

Dr. Judith Holder:

I think there are principles, precepts, concepts that can lay the foundation of understanding who we are, and what we need to do in living a more purposeful funfilled contentment type of life. And I think there are certain life issues, concerns, situation situations, experiences that get in our way to living a more fulfilling life. And we don't necessarily have a blueprint about how to select the how to box, how to do that, how to integrate my sense of self and my spiritual self, with all these different events that occur within my life. What would that look like? How could it really helped me to feel more solid and supported and more sense of direction. And one of the things I was thinking about is, we need the knee kind of a foundation, the foundation and lay is kind of like allows you to build on. And there are certain precepts and concepts and principles that are helpful to be aware of, there are certain universal laws that are helpful to be attuned to when you're living your life. So this episode, and a couple of other episodes are going to be really focused on meaning seven that foundation and it's probably going to be laying that foundation all throughout our time together. And mastering life's adventures, inspiring you to be your best, because they come up in different ways. And we can't always talk about them all at once. But there is four do I want to I do want to talk about.

Dr. Judith Holder:

And the first one I'm going to talk about in this episode, and the remaining ones in this in the next several episodes of our time together. So the first one, which lays that foundation, and think of that foundation, as essentially, you're laying the bedrock to understanding why we handle and do certain things that happened to us what why are they aren't recurring cycles for us or were recurring patterns that are happening. And one of those spiritual life principles is our attention informs our reality, our attention and forms our reality. And so sometimes, we don't even think about where we're putting our attention. We're not being aware of the fact that we just put on several hours to looking at TV, which was very, very destructive in some ways, because it just made us feel more stressed, stressed, frustrated, annoyed, even angry over some of the things that are occurring in the world that we're looking at, be aware of your attention and where you're putting it to, because it does have an impact on your sense of well being and also and what you are feeding yourself on a daily basis. does it relate to TV? does it relate to video games? does it relate to the social media? does it relate to reading a book and certain types of books does relate to how the daily living of life and having to raise kids or relate to as a leader having put in so many hours in trying to get this project moving forward and being successful.

Dr. Judith Holder:

Or mom who's have to multitask and do different types of activities. You know, the the baby the baby and put clothes on your next child and being able to make meals and do the laundry, keep the house clean, where are we putting our attention. And one of the first things I want you to start thinking about is, where's my attention, going to start putting, getting a little list. And being aware, I spent a lot of time doing this, or thinking this or feeling in a certain way, because that does inform our reality. And that reality is made of all these different pieces, and what we're putting our attention to. And we want to have clarity in our attention, because otherwise, with all the things that are going on in the world, and all the ways in which we may be finding ourselves feeling more frustrated, or annoyed, we have to realize that sometimes we have our attention, so scattered in so many different directions, that it's creates a sense of restlessness. We don't you know, we go here, and we do a little bit of this. And we do a little bit of that. And we do a little bit of this over here. But we don't feel that sense of connectedness, our attention informs our reality. So if we're doing all these little bits of pieces, and we're not more intentional about what we're doing, then that's where a potter the challenge is, with laying a good foundation in terms of integrating your spirituality into your everyday life. Because of everything I said, so far, the intention was not put to your spiritual well being and your spiritual consumption of information, and books and CDs and streaming and talking about spiritual ality constitute spiritual types of concepts. So we have to be aware that if we don't put a lot of attention to it, why respecting ourselves to be more rooted in our spirituality. And even when we do that, even with meditation, sometimes our our attention really is kind of scattered, because it's going all over the place with monkey mind, so to speak. And that increases our restlessness too. But if you're able to put your attention to the core essence of who you are, and that is through meditation, or through readings, or other you know, being in nature, there's many ways in which you can be able to do that, you know, that begins to shift ourselves of what we want to be have more of in our life.

Dr. Judith Holder:

And I think of the analogy about the importance of attention and have it more kind of streamlined is my father, for example. He loved anything with a ball. He passed in 2019. And he was a great father. He, but and he was also a great baseball player, and played for the monarchs back in the day. And one of the things that he would always say, and we were playing bowl and we were doing bowling, is he would look at the lane and see where he was kind of headed towards in terms of those pins. And he would just swing it down in and put it down on that lane and with code down that lane. And then he would get a strike. And he was so delighted. And we were delighted for him as well, because he was focused on, you know, his intention of what he wanted to have happen. And sometimes in the beginning stages of helping to get our attention to move in the right direction. We need to put up those guardrails like and bowling when you're you know, when a youngster is bowling, they have these guardrails that come up so it makes sure that the ball doesn't go into the gutter, the right gutter or the left gutter, it just continues to move, even if it's slow, is to continues to move down, you know, to hit the pins itself. So we have to think about for ourselves is that if we have so many distractions, which is that ball going into the gutter to the right, or to the left gutter doesn't really matter. They're still gutters, then we're not focused in moving towards our goal, which is to hit the pins and hopefully, you know get a strike or a spare or just to hit a few. All is good. So our intention, and unformed our reality. And the thing that gets in the way of the attention is distractions. And I'm going to talk about that in another in another next episode. But in terms of informing our reality, it does inform our reality because Murphy in a book that he wrote down decades ago, the power of the subconscious mind, he said is extremely powerful and is based upon our attention and where we put our attention to and he was in his book described your subconscious mind is like the genie in the lamp. Now the genie would give you the UI wishes, your command and type of Genie. And so you would rub with your attention, the genie come up, which is your subconscious mind. And your subconscious mind says, Your wish is my command. The subconscious mind can't say no. It's like a, I guess I should say, in the 20th century, when you had tape recorders. Today, you have the iPhone and recorders or the other brand recorders that you can utilize on your phone. But regardless, it's your subconscious mind is a blank tape. And it cannot say no to what you're putting on that blank tape. It does really say Your wish is my command. So the conscious mind aware we're putting our attention that's being recorded at a deeper level at this subconscious level within us. And it's trying to bring those things to us. Because as Murphy said, is the power of the subconscious mind the power is we this conscious mind is the law of attractions is bringing to us what you said you want it, but then when you got it, it's like No, that isn't that that's not right, I don't want that either.

Dr. Judith Holder:

So our intention does inform our reality, because of the power of the subconscious mind. It brings to us things that we had a desire for. And we don't realize how strong maybe that desire was, or maybe we do. And it's the law of attraction is trying to always bring it back to us. So we have to be aware that we are more selective when you're walking your spiritual path, or what you're putting your attention to. And that is one of our foundational stone, to be able to live a more enriching, fulfilling, joyful life, his I don't want my attention to this over here, which is about violence, and about, you know, killing and murder, or I don't want to put my attention over here, which is about all this horrific things that are happening in these movies, that because our attention is so much focused on that movie, or that TV show, or on that news clip, that we don't realize that where our attention goes is where our experience will be, is where our reality will be. And that's why we can move into a movie and with the characters of that movie, and feel like we're right there, you know, in that movie, but is it a movie, we really want to be right there in if we're walking a spiritual path, and we're trying to integrate it is as if we don't have any room for our spirituality, because we've cluttered our house with all these other types of energy. And there is energies, energetic energy, so that that's why attention does have an impact upon us, because we put our attention over here, which is about that movie, or about that character, or about that concert. And we don't realize energetically, we're also is occupying space within us, and our thoughts and our words, and our bodies. And it's also then moving into subconscious and having space down and our subconscious aspect of who we are. So the conscious mind will forget about some of the things we put our attention to so consistently. And then but it doesn't mean that it's not operating is not flowing, in terms of trying to bring to us somebody, so you want this. So we end up developing a craving for something, oh, we develop a habit for something and you realize why, you know, wow. Yeah, I really, you know, find myself going out all the time getting this whatever this is.

Dr. Judith Holder:

We have to be aware when you're walking a spiritual path and a joyful one at that, is that we are more aware and attune to that I want my reality to be filled with joy, with happiness with understanding of other situations and people it doesn't mean we don't see the world as it is we do but it doesn't mean as analogy I use sometimes working with my clients is a bird may land on your head. But it doesn't have to build a nest. So situations and circumstances and even people make it the best of us at times. We're human you know we have reactions to things, but we don't allow allow it to fester so much that our attention goes to it so much that it's ruined our day, or it's ruined our week, or it's ruined our month, or it's warned our year. It's like, no, no, no, let's stop. And let's be routed back, I can put my attention to something else. And I can figure out a way to resolve this tension that exists within me, which we'll talk about, you know, along our episodes here, in mastery in life's adventures, we can find a way to kind of pivot and move our attention in a different way, by the mere fact. But we are now more aware of that attention informs our reality.

Dr. Judith Holder:

So when we began to look more proactively about where's my attention going to what percentage out of 100? The do I find my attention going to what? And start writing them down for yourself, start looking at it for in the next week, what you notice where your attention is going to? And then you start thinking the next step is to I wanted my attention to go to all these things. If I'm trying to have a greater sense of inner calmness, peace, joy, happiness within me, do I want it to go to all these things? Or maybe there's another way, I can start to redirect my attention to what I want more of a attention informs reality. So if we want more happiness, or peace or inner contentment, what are we doing to be able to have more of that? Yes, meditation is a great thing. Yoga is a great thing. Walking in nature is excellent. Whatever you choose, just be aware, is something that brings upliftment centeredness, balance, a greater sense of at ease within, and then a sense of restlessness. And restlessness means that our attention is going too many directions, because we're searching for something we wanting something more, this is not exciting, this is not happy happiness for me, or, or this is boring, we're going to talk about that in some of our EPS episodes, because those are habits that have been developed, you know, over a few months, a few years or a few decades. And sometimes we have to learn how to, I'm going to use the word transmute or to change that habit pattern that is developed, in order for us to have greater space for the inner harmony, peace, and are working with our loved ones, and our interactions in the day to day basis in our families, you know, when we're working at work, and we may be in a leadership role, or a supporting role, in which we need to be able to have a greater measure of that easement inside. Regardless of the chaos and confusion that is occurring in the work environment, you can be that anchor of peace, and harmony, and not be caught up in the whirlwind of the tornado or the hurricane, what's going on within the work environment, or even in our home environment as well. And we also tying in to the fact that the more that we are seeing how our attention is informing our reality, it is helping us to be able to have a greater decision making a decision to say no, not this. But this is what I want more of. I want greater harmony, peace, joy, as we were saying before. So if you want more of that, then we've got to put our attention more to that.

Dr. Judith Holder:

So one of the things you're thinking about is how do I use my daily skills, practices, principles that I have been rooting myself in? Are they the ones that I want to route myself in, in terms my attention? And is there some other things that I can be able to do that allows me to feel like I'm more integrated, have a greater sense of wholeness at this phase in my life, and clear clarity about next steps that I want in my life? And so what I'm saying is the first thing we have to learn as a foundation of stone or as a foundational pillar, is that our attention informs our reality. It allows us to really move into the core of who we are, which we'll be talking about in nationalized adventures. I'm calling into the Horror, that true self, that essential self, the real or authentic, you and who you are, whatever word you want to use, that's fine, but it's the core for the true self, of who you are. So with that being said, and asking you to start to be attune to where you're putting your attention, and start to note those things for yourself, and give some percentages to that, in the next week. It'll be great to know how you fare, please, you know, send me a message and let me know, or just note it for yourself, and then tune into next week, when we lay the next foundational stone, or the next pillar, however, you want to think about it, as in terms of helping you to understand certain key elements and principles that will allow you to be more intentional about how you want to show up as you live your life and how you can be able to begin to let go, or certain things that are not serving you very well. Remember the genie and the lamp. As you're moving through your week. To Genie, the subconscious says Your wish is my command. So am I really putting my attention to the things that I really want? Or I'm finding that I want different things, putting my intention to all the wrong things, or a percentage of the wrong things. I want to a greater percentage of the right things to put my attention to. So this is Dr. Judith at Mastering Life's Adventures. And we are we have focused in this episode on attention informs your reality. Hope this was helpful to you. certainly look forward to our next time together.